District Court, captioned USA v. Samuels et al, which got under way this week as prosecutors offered jurors a glimpse of one of the more jaw-dropping federal cases in recent memory. The government alleges that a local brother-sister duo, David and Maria Samuels, with the help of accomplices, including a supposed hitman, ran a sprawling insurance fraud scheme that netted tens of thousands of dollars in two arsons and a murder.
Sasikala’s final deceit? A midnight swearing-in, and the return of the Mannargudi family
The Samuels siblings and two others, Charles Moss and Jermaine Surtain, are charged with criminal counts ranging from conspiracy to wire fraud. Two other co-defendants, crooked insurance agent Stefan Michael James and family friend Damian Landry, have previously pleaded guilty and agreed to cooperate in the prosecution. The case is a tangled web, as noted by attorneys in the first day of the trial. Former lovers, family members, co-conspirators and at least one convicted felon are expected to be among the dozens to testify.
In explaining the case to jurors Monday, Assistant U. Attorney Bill McSherry said the insurance schemes stem from three incidents: a arson on a West Bank home, the murder of Treyor August, and the burning of Samuels' van, which was allegedly used in the murder. McSherry portrayed Samuels as the mastermind of the group, a kingpin who ran various frauds and made sure he always had an alibi for each one. With the assistance of James, the insurance agent, the Samuels family obtained an insurance policy on their cousin's life, allegedly providing false information and doctoring the paperwork so that they were the beneficiaries.
The payments were made via checks from a small company run by David Samuels. In addition, Samuels took out an auto insurance policy on his Chrysler van. As part of the plan, Samuels allegedly coaxed a former military buddy, Charles Moss, into traveling in late April to New Orleans from Detroit. Meanwhile, Surtain was released from a federal drug rehabilitation program. The next day, Moss allegedly lured August into the van, which he drove toward a club near the block of Bienville Street in Mid-City.
There, Moss ditched the van as Surtain ambushed August, shooting him several times and ultimately standing over him and firing one last gunshot to his head, according to the government. Prosecutors allege records show that Surtain and Moss exchanged numerous phone calls in the minutes leading up to the murder. In a separate alleged insurance fraud eight days later, two masked men torched the van as it sat outside Samuels' home.
In the hours after the incident, Samuels and Surtain exchanged 26 phone calls, according to prosecutors. The third alleged insurance scheme centers on a arson at Damian Landry's home in Harvey. Landry and David Samuels worked together at Volunteers of America, a national nonprofit group that does community outreach.
The wife of James, the crooked insurance agent, also worked there, according to the government. Landry, who was in dire financial straits, agreed to go along with Samuels' suggested insurance fraud, McSherry said. Moss, who would later allegedly assist in the August murder, burned the house, prosecutors allege. But in doing so, he accidentally burned his hands and face, and was admitted to Charity Hospital for treatment.
Eventually, the insurance payments came, but the payout was not as high as expected and Landry refused to pay David Samuels, prosecutors allege. Samuels' attorney, Warren L. We have always had a really fun and nice family Christmas over the years at my parents. Since my dad's passing, some financial issues came up due to Mark being the "Power of Attorney". Well Mark found out that while I was in college, my parents were paying my rent. I am a single mother with three kids.
They are very pro-education. I was going to quit teacher school as I was broke. They stepped in and said "no, we will help you". Well they did this for four years. My brother made it known that the financial help was cut off and I would have to fend for myself. I understand all of that. That has happened. I am on my own now taking care of my own.
So last night I'm talking with my spiritual mentor and she lets out that my family is estranged. I was shocked at her revelation. I always said we are distant. We have never had confrontations or issues to deal with. We just don't really bother with each other. It's not just me, it's within the entire family unit. Everyone always went through my parents to hear about each other the siblings.
Defined by Deceit – VIA Star Wings Books
So now, I want to learn about "estrangement" and how it may be true in my family. Be careful believing what you hear. It sounds like your family has drifted apart, but not so much due to estrangement. But more because of stress and differences in lifestyles. And your brother is being harsh with you, imho. Estrangement is a solid decision not to interact with family. It may even be announced to you that someone has chosen not to be around you any more.
That is times worse than simply drifting apart. It is harder to scale a concrete wall than it is to bridge a gap. So, I would ask your family if they feel close enough to each other. And try to let bygones be bygones. Keep things light. Let them know you miss them. And would love to rebuild good experiences together. Then see what they say. People tend to mature over time.
And value relationships more. At least I think they do. So, they may be ready for that. This is the first response I've received. At any rate, thanks for the recommendation of the reconciliation book. I'm going to check it out at the library today if possible. I'm not sure what intent you had saying this but it seems, as you say, you still have open wounds yourself.
This is a good article. Since my dad died nearly 2 years ago and I was left traumatised by the short illness and death I feel I have been deliberately avoiding my immediate family. Didn't really realise it at the time, but it is my way of coping. I guess getting together with family made it all the more obvious dad is missing. Also, we went through a lot together, and now have tried to find a type of normality again. My parents were divorced, but became good friends again once they worked through their differences.
My mother is basically emotionally unavailable. This I realise has made me feel embarrassed to cry infront of her because she's not joining in! It's like someone patting you and saying "there there". Not the same as crying with you. Plus I have 2 brothers, so they aren't crying. Of course they did when Dad died.
Dad was the one who cried infront of me and made me feel like it was ok to show your emotions I'm a girl by the way! Probably why I love performing. Now he's gone, and the counsellor I ended up seeing had to convince me that my dad's death was as good a reason to cry as any. I can't believe I felt bad about it! When Dad died I hid myself away from my family so I could grieve properly without feeling I had to hold it in which is exactly what I did when my parents divorced when I was 11 - pretend everything's alright and then let it out in my bedroom alone. We are not estranged, but I had distanced myself deliberately to get through it without feeling my emotions were wrong.
I wonder if anyone else has had this experience? I love my daughter more than anything. We did not have it easy. I just found out she is seeing a psychiatrist. I knew someone was keeping her away from me. It's the psychiatrist! My daughter will not listen to me. She does not want to hear from me. She said if I send her a letter she would tear it up! Out of the blue this happens. I am heartbroken. She does not want me to call her. She does not want to see me. I know she loves me. We were very close and had many many happy times together. Especially when she went to college.
When she was a toddler. I took her with me where ever I went. She was a beautiful child. She is a beautiful woman. I enrolled her in private schools. She is very special and gifted. I wanted her to get the best education. Tonight on the phone. This special child of mine called me the most dreadful names! I will leave her alone tho. I don't like it. I hope I can stay strong until I can see her again. Hug her and tell her how much I love her.
I am crying now. I am worried. This is so wrong. You said that your daughter was seeing a psychiatrist. This indicates that she may have some mental health difficulties and not coping very well at the moment. If she is unwell, this could be a reason why she is pushing you away. There are many mental health conditions that cause people to isolate themselves, feel angry all the time or perceive reality in a different way.
It may not seem like it but your daughter may need your support. Psychiatrists are medically trained and often prescribe medications. They are not counsellors or psychotherapists and they do not offer advice to people on how to live their lives. I doubt that it is a psychiatrist who is keeping your daughter away from you but they are probably treating her for something. Thank you for answering. I don't know how to support my daughter except to leave her alone like she wants me to.
This is so hard too. We use to be very close. I knew all her friends and they knew me. I miss those days. My daughter and I use to meet for lunch. I am so worried that the person she is in a relationship with is the one that is responsible. He never tried to get to know me. And I did try to get to know him. A couple of months ago my daughter had the shingles on her forehead! She is under a lot of stress.
She is very intelligent and a college graduate. But sometimes the most intelligent can make mistakes too. In choosing a partner. It will be a month the 28th of September. I think of all the happy times we had together. I still can't believe the way she talked to me the last time. It was really bad. I am shocked that she could talk to me the way she did. I've done the same to my older sister and Mother. No abuse, no strange stuff during childhoood, I simply have no feelings or emotions for either of them.
We have nothing in common, our conversations as of 2 years ago totaled 6 words and silence. I cut both of them off. Why burden myself with crap like that? I'm happy and the only thing I dread is their funerals. I don't want to go. Why should I? My family consists of my father and my partner of 17 years. That's it. I just got off the phone with a close friend. She knows my daughter will be back in my live.
That my daughter will miss me and need me to be there for her. My friend wants me to take care of myself. My body is shutting down from being sad,upset and very worried about my daughter. I have been there for my daughter many times. When she got her first divorce. I was there. She had to sell her beautiful home. I was there for her. When she was feeling blue. I am going to take my friends advice and take care of myself to be strong and healthy to be there for my daughter. I have had to do this recently and everyone around me is making it seem like I need to have a relationship with a toxic family member.
I do not feel guilty for the estrangement, but others are trying to make me feel that way. I am uninterested in having a relationship with a person who verbally abuses me and has an unhappy life. I want to know if you can write a column on how to deal with the aftermath of a toxic relationship. I would be interested in such advice as well. I have also cut off contact with a severely toxic person; my older sister.
My other sister and my mother keep telling me "I'm too hard on people". Why should I continue to put up with a person who has continually manipulated and disrespected me on such a disgusting scale that I can barely believe I put up with it for as long as I did.
What to Do Upon Learning of the Death
I gave her chance after chance after chance, and did everything I could to communicate to her how upset I was with her behavior. I was letting her live in my house rent free, and after her stepping on every boundary I set, I finally asked her to leave at this point she had enough money to get her own place thanks to me and even helped her by printing a bunch of apartments for her that fit her budget and wishes. Instead of a "thank you" for putting up with all of this, or a "sorry" for being the worst house-guest imaginable, she had the gall to go around crying to my mom and sister about how horrible I was for wanting my own space back again.
She plays the victim yet she uses and manipulates people for her own selfish purposes. This has been a lifelong pattern with her and people continue to fall for it. She is a liar, a con artist, and just an all around toxic person. Why should I continue to waste my energy on someone like this? Because we share the same parents? Now I'm seen as the mean one for cutting her off. The three of them just got together for Christmas eve, and all neglected to tell me. She is playing the martyr by sending me nice texts trying to lure me back but I am done with her.
I saw her for who she is and she is an ugly ugly human being. I was very close with my father and grandmother but they're both dead. These three are the only family I have left, and at this point I'm considering cutting off contact with my other sister and my mother. I am so hurt by their expecting me to take this from her and by their letting her behavior slide because "she's sick" and "she can't help it".
What am I a human dumping ground? Our family is just beyond dis-functional I think that it is time to just let them all go I really appreciate your comment about how "I saw her for who she is. See, with people who don't have a personality disorder or major emotional issues, they fight and argue - but they don't fight dirty. You're talking about having seen a color of ugliness or meanness that you can't move past - and I don't know that you should!
Some people simply have a lot of anger and hatred inside them, and the most dangerous people are always people who are the most unhappy and most insecure. The idea of estrangement is something only people who come from very messed up families can understand. Don't ever expect someone else to understand. You know, you lived it. And when you really know something in your heart, you don't second-guess it.
Your decision took courage. It can be very lonely at first when you estrange yourself, but over the long term, it is often worth it. You simply can't stay sane in insane relationships. Ultimately, estrangements in the worst relationships are about being the lesser of two evils. Cut your losses and set yourself free from the uncertainty and the emotional roller-coaster. I had to say good bye forever, hopefully, to a narcissistic family member. Because I suffer from chronic depression, anxiety and sometimes substance issues to cope poorly , it was so easy for them to make this my fault.
I also tried to handle it far longer than was bearable and lashed out in anger which never helps. I've been cut off from everyone and I still have more peace. I can be an extremely easy target. Needing to make everything right and confess my part in any conflict. Mother's milk to a narcissist. They can use your words and especially anything written against you. I would recommend to anyone that has such challenges to keep as much of your struggle to yourself from supposed loved ones who will use it against you.
I learned this way too late in my life. Counselors, priests, ministers. Anyone who is legally bound to keep a confidence is much better to turn to. It is so hard to go through something as painful as a family member being so hateful. My daughter has done what she has done for all the wrong reasons. I pray for her and think about her everyday. I pray that she is doing well. At one time we were very close so I am very confused to her decision to treat me the way she did. I am concentrating on my health and trying to get stronger mentally too. I want to be strong if she comes back into my life.
I have been told by people she will come back. I miss her very much and all the happy times we had together. I am scared that this is my life now. I find myself avoiding any attempt making friends because I am still emotionally exhausted and can't be bothered. Will that ever change? I want a full and happy life but who am I and how much do I have to disclose to friends or potential mates? I don't want to have to rehash it all to explain my baggage but by not disclosing is that being deceitful? I struggle with this conundrum the most.
I have been estranged from my parents for over 25 years but would not change it for the world. My father is an abusive, alcoholic pedophile and my mother is the ultimate enabler of manipulation and deceit to get her way. Together they created a level of familial dysfunction that still goes on today. For a long time I tried to play the game to get along and peacefully coexist in their lives.
A game I never understood and hated to play until finally I said I had to change it and I started making decisions based on my goals and aspirations. Gradually, one by one, my siblings and their children started to drop off. On the bright side, when my healing and self forgiveness got to a point where I could process the why and the why not's I am still confident this is the right choice for me; however, I am feeling more alone now than ever.
I was divorced due to emotional neglect as well. He was the wrong man for me. Instead of communicating, I numbed the pain and self medicated with alcohol which in turn caused an adverse reaction to the meds I was on to treat my depression and PTSD. I never made the connection, nor would I have stopped regardless of the warnings. That is what addiction did to me. Obliviously going through the motions like Groundhog Day thinking I was in the right and everyone else was not.
That was not reality. I had no idea how much of a disaster I had evolved into until the final sibling left my life and I could finally forgive myself for not fitting into their world. I started to reflect on my responsibility in the entire experience. I finally recognized that by pretending everything was "fine" and sticking my head in the proverbial sand I was not solving my problems but shoving it down to make me think I was OK.
I was far from OK but I could only see it after decades of repeated bad behavior that I needed to stop and take care of me no matter who it offended. I went to see a psychiatrist, a psychologist and a priest. I did the formal Act of Reconciliation with God and cried afterwards to have all of the emotional weight off of my shoulders.
Today I am still alone. From time to time I wish I had a family to turn to when I need help or advice but I believe if I let even one back in, it will be a slippery slope that I should avoid it at all costs. I know you wrote this about 5 years ago but wanted to let you know you are not alone. Sending you health and happiness. Best of luck to us both! Wow, estrangement is something I have HAD to live with I, along with a number of girls in our extended family, were all sexually abused by him for most of our growing years.
He was never held accountable, my mother - who knew he was a pedophile - was never held accountable for not protecting me or us, for not speaking up, and she continued through my whole life well after his death, with a distorted perception of who I was her only daughter , playing out her distorted perception of girls and womanhood She even told those who would listen that she considered me 'dead'. So I survived all that abuse, I survived her emotional abuse and at the age of 30 I decided enough was enough, and I walked away.
At the time, I had no-one, and I so needed support, but she was just too cruel and I knew I HAD to walk away in order to be able to have a chance at a normal happy life. It turned out to be the best thing I ever did. From that moment on, good things just came to me I don't see it as estrangement, rather, taking control of my life.
As a child you can't walk away, you have to kiss your 'poppy' hello even though your little body hurts and stings after his abuse You can't even walk away from your mother, because you are told your mother is there to protect and love you and you are not allowed to question her, even though you know in your heart she resents you and doesn't love you.
Is that estrangement I don't think so. It's called survival, and survive I did. I have made a success of my life, I have a loving husband and beautiful children I went on to have a career that my mother tried again and again to convince me I could never have But that didn't deter me, I kept going and kept believing in myself, despite her. I may not have a wonderful mum to come by and enjoy my children, me or my husband I feel sad for her and the fact that she couldn't simply 'love' her way out of her abuse Am I angry that I missed out on a normal loving family?
Why wouldn't I be?? Am I regretful that I walked away? Yes - but not for walking away, rather for taking so long to make the decision. I was hoping for a loving mother whom never existed, and that was so time consuming I wasted much time searching for love from a person who simply had no capacity to give it. Do I envy others with normal loving mothers and families? You bet I do. And every day I try to be the mother to my beautiful children, that I never had. That makes me smile and fills my heart with great love, the love that I missed out on for so many years, I have found in my own heart to give to others.
It takes courage and strength to walk away. One day when I write my book, I hope to be able to encourage others to do the same and reclaim their lives, as I did mine. Estrangement indicates a difficulty, a handicap even. However walking away to reclaim your life is far from 'wanting', it is the opposite of wanting, it is realising you are given what you are given in life, and what really matters is what you DO with it. I am estranged from my brother. Some of the comments here resonate with me, others - not so much.
NO ONE knows about the relationship between us, or why I am unable to have a relationship with him now. NO ONE knows the suffering involved in our family dynamic, how our family is dysfunctional. Like everybody else in the world, we look normal and nice on the outside, but the inside We are approaching elderly. We live states apart. He will never change. I won't change in how I react to him. Can you guess? He is so good at pulling my strings! I suppose I could go to therapy for this. Maybe I will someday.
I am happy, have a great family and marriage. A healthy core is required so that offspring can go and found their own families. Frankly, other than a nice greeting now and then, what more is required? I am devoting myself to my immediate family and grandchildren, not ruminating about past hurts and the judgements of people who don't even know me anymore, people who never come to see me. I wish my brother well. I forgive you for the physical and mental abuse. But I am not going to purposely subject myself to it. Ever again. Thank you, Abby. My parents are divorced and I am not close to my brothers.
Dealing with my parents' health declines in old age has been stressful. My husband's family is geographically distant. Basically, there is not much holding us together. They are unpleasant to be around. I feel like nothing is fixable and I don't want anything to do with them. I had infertility and have no children. But if I ever need help, it will come from friends because these people are not going to lift a finger. Families are not like they once were and it is very hard to stay close when you are spread apart. But I am dealing with people who are selfish and ungrateful and unmotivated to have a close family, so I am unlikely to be successful anyway.
It is such a cost for so little prospect of gain. I am not making a scene, just drifting away. Birthday text message and Done! Thank you, Cat Lady, for the reply. I commend your plan. I had to update my post because guess what? My mother died, the remaining nuclear family member. The funeral and surrounding events were so ghastly brother's family so rude it was like a movie and guests remarked on it. Of course now comes the attorneys as my brother is called on the carpet by the state for his handling of my parent's estates. Or bitter. Or angry. I'm not. But it's a tornado in your heart and mind when you realize that everything you didn't want to admit, for decades, is true.
The misery I experienced in all those years did not help a thing and even though I believe there was nothing else I could do, it still hurt to realize the useless emotions I suffered. In fact, I only made it worse by trying to support him when he is mentally ill. Oh, well. That's all behind me now and he is the one who must deal with the logical consequences of his behavior. When I think of him, it is with pity and love and moving on, knowing that he is no longer part of my life.
Learn the lessons, don't perpetuate the problems, seek help, move on. Be at peace. Abby, it is good to hear an update from you, even though sad things have happened. My condolences for the loss of your mother. As time goes by, I feel more powerless in the face of so many things that are outside our control--living far apart, having the temperaments we have, past misunderstandings that will never be erased. And just to let go of what I cannot change, as you said, to be at peace.
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It is a big relief whenever I am able to let go of feeling guilty and judged. I don't cultivate anger. I pretend I am a leopard quietly tiptoeing back into the dappled shade. Be well, my friend. I have been estranged from my family for over a year now. The relationship between myself and my parents has pretty much always been dysfunctional. I distanced myself from them first and only really had contact with my sister who I was very close to and regarded as my best friend. The relationship between my sister and I started to deteriorate quite quickly. The situation was difficult for her as she wanted to invite both myself and my parents to events as she had a relationship with both of us even though my parents and I were not talking.
When the family got together the atmosphere was very tense and my sister likely felt stuck in the middle. I think she felt that she had to choose between me and our parents which actually I can understand as it would make her life easier. Things became very bitter and hostile and I eventually said I didn't want to hear from her again. I am conflicted in this decision as I feel my life is a lot less complicated for not being in touch with my family however I desperately miss my sister.
I can't reconcile as she has said and done things which can't be taken back and I never knew she felt that way about me. Now I do know how she really felt I could never trust her enough to have her in my life again. I don't imagine that she feels the same pain as I feel anyway. I think about her and miss her every day. I have a huge sense of loss I can't seem to get past. I try and find things out about her by looking her up online but that just makes me feel worse yet I can't seem to stop doing it. Reconciliation is not an option but I wish I could stop feeling the pain of our lost relationship.
I can relate to how you're feeling about your sister. I miss my sister too, but she has said and done things that can't be taken back either. She will not talk about our problems, she will change the subject when I want to talk about what's dividing us. She will not admit to her wrongdoing in our situation, and she has not given me a serious apology without sounding like she's projecting the blame on me for how I feel about her negative words and actions.
So, because she refuses to talk about it,there cannot be any understanding about why our situation happened in the first place. Because of her uncooperation and lack of honesty in our situation, it only makes me distrust her even more I was diagnosed with leukemia a year ago after suffering total disability since after being crushed at work. Because my injuries are nerve injuries they cannot be x-rayed for proof of the damage so essentially, I was put out of work with no recourse or assistance. My family has always used me as the scapegoat and this was rewarded by my mother who is still ticked off at me for not dying when I was born very ill like was supposed to.
I have dealt with this garbage all my life and in my mid teens believed I was crazy. There wasn't such a thing as child abuse when I was a kid so technically I was not abused. She and my older sister ganged up on me and had me committed to a mental institution in my later teens until some of the staff got together and discussed my issues.
They did whatever they could and got me out of there and helped line up a job and apartment for me. I have not been back since but I have been in counseling with some counselors I knew through work or college and I trusted them. The problem is that last 38 years of my has been a total lie about who I am and prevented me feeling any real joy. It took everything I had to stay away from any treatment that would or could result in hospitalization, I have lived behind a mask of "normal".
When my soon to be adopted daughter got killed by a hit and run driver, I dealt with it alone, I hardened my heart so it wouldn't keep hurting at least on the outside. When I got injured nobody in my family cared at all and another sister used any information she got about me to pretend she had it worse, of course, she also asked at a church once for financial help due to her prostate cancer.
I walked out of that church right then and haven't gone back. My mother rewards my siblings to abuse and mistreat me, she manipulates them into pretending they are close to me to get information and then she throws it in my face saying and doing anything she knows will cause me unrest just trying to send me back into the hospital. It has been nearly 40 years I've been out of the hospital but the attempts to have me in there seems to be her ultimate goal. When my dad was dying my mom failed to let me know in spite of letting my other six siblings have time to visit before his surgery, then refused to allow me to even talk to him on the phone, unfortunately he died 2 weeks before I got to see him.
After he came home from the hospital, he wouldn't talk to anyone and kept asking for me so my mother told my sisters to pretend they were me so he would talk a sister confessed this to me just a few weeks ago. I know he was never told how many times I called and my mother had excuse after excuse of why he couldn't get on the phone then. My dad discovered the mistreatment from my mother and siblings when I was 13 and he became disabled and could not work anymore.
He took me under his wing and didn't allow my mother and me to have "alone" time because that was when she would hurt me most. He and I were very close. Because of him, I managed to get away and be alive for the last 4 decades, for which I am eternally grateful because I would have been dead a long time ago and not had some very wonderful events happen in my life, such as falling in love or becoming a step-grandmother. When I was diagnosed with leukemia I sort of expected a little kindness, I don't know why but I had hoped. That obviously didn't and probably will never happen.
Ten years ago, I married my 'mother' after being divorced for 11 years, living on my own and doing well, in spite of the wheelchair and limited movement issues. My now husband is just like her and I have no clue how I did not pick up on that in time. But I don't have enough time or health left to start over in counseling and learn how to choose better or get away from the domestic abuse I live with.
Since I am now bedridden, I am basically a prisoner in my home, I wonder how I am going to cope with setting any boundaries that I have now contemplated for a long time. I am so accustomed to being hurt through their words and actions it will be like I have no identity left and since I am obviously dying soon anyway, what's even the point.
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I will never get over, get past, or resolve any of these issues, because my husband does not allow me to get counseling or even getting there he took my car and traded if for one I cannot load my wheelchair and I do not have the cash to buy online counseling. In spite of my 'families' obvious hatred of me, apart from them I have experienced some fairly great things in my life, I worked with troubled youth and gangs--was the most requested counselor, delivered a baby, got high awards in college and throughout my work and volunteer career.
I have also been published, turned a retail stores upside down collections problems around completely and been a good long-time friend to several people. I have already traveled around the world and seen all but 3 places I had on my bucket list. While none of these were ever goals of mine, I faked my way through, appearing to be 'fine' all that time. Never being honest with who you are has serious effects.
Hoping that one day things will change is just not reasonable and severely limits one's life. I wish I could have resolved this issue 40 years ago and walked away then. I might have been able to have lived my life being real. I might have been able to feel joy in my life rather than just going through the motions, wearing the mask I used to keep everyone away. I have finally learned that horrible truth. I do often wonder if I had dropped them a long time ago if things would be different today, than me dying alone because I failed to set and enforce boundaries and just allowed them to hurt me all this time under the guise of 'good daughter'.
So lately I have been reading up on some if the feelings I've been feeling. I am a teenager and I know my feelings may not be temporary. Lately, I've been feeling real distant towards my family. I spent a good portion of my life around them, so much so if I just wanted to be alone while everyone else went out I couldn't and I rarely went out with friends. Now, I'm 17, trying to play social catch up I have a horrible sense of direction, I barely know how to take the bus and trying to relate to others my age. I'm living with my grandmother and it's been great.
I have lots of space to do what I want homework, chores, exercise, ho out, etc , but now my mom wants to get closer to me. We had a rocky relationship when I was younger, me not understanding that she was trying to love me the best way she knew how, and her, not understanding that I also needed her emotionally. Now my mom's remarried and moved and she had my younger sister and another on the way. Sometimes she also isn't around like we're supposed to have family time, but then she goes off with my step dad and it'll just be me and my siblings or me and my younger sister , or if I talk about school I go to a really demanding school too much.
Then she still wants me to come around. I am not sure how I want our relationship to look like going further once I start college. She gets upset with me for wanting to be alone, still and I wonder if I'm a jerk for liking to be alone. My estrangement story involves my brother and my mother. My mother is an undiagnosed covert-aggressive type George Simon's "In Sheep's Clothing" is basically about, every single little detail.